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Thursday, September 25, 2008

Bringing Suicide Out of the Darkness One Step at a Time!!!

Please join with us this Saturday at Wheeler Farm (6351 S. 900 E.) in Salt Lake City as we take steps to bring suicide and mental illness out of the darkness.

Thank you to all of you that have supported me in my service for The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP) and especially for helping us here. It has been rather frustrating to see how many people think that this is not a problem here in Utah, and for those that have not personally felt the pain of losing a loved one to suicide it may not be--but suicide is the 4th leading cause of death in the US (ages 18-65) and 3rd among teens and young adults. And Sadly Utah ranks in the top 10 on all polls for deaths by suicide.

Out of Darkness 20mi. Overnight NYC 2007

Out of Darkness 5k Boca Raton, FL 2007

Out of Darkness 5k Miami, FL 2007

I really appreciate my family joining with me this year--I know that everyone mourns the loss of a loved one differently, and that we are all very busy, so it makes me appreciate my mom, Matt, Laurie & the girls, Brad, Abby & Mo...and the many other family members that are coming out to support. Thanks to friends, roommates, mission companions, ward members, corporations, teachers, classmates, clients & everyone of you that has given me the strength to put one foot in front of the other. Thank you to newpapers, television, radio, civic and religious people who are contributing--this event would not happen without each of you.

And a particular thanks to Lori Pagel, my good friend, example and walk co-ordinator--THANK YOU!!! I appreciate so much your friendship and dedication to helping people. As I was talking with Lori this evening, everything is on track for the event Saturday, and I have to admit a part of my heart just feels broken--This is not a cause I ever would have chosen--this is not a cause I ever wanted to know the need for--I would much rather have spent hours each week with my brother Scott. I miss him very much. I don't know that I can say the pain has lessened, but I have been enabled by God, greater faith, and resources and love from those around me to live with the pain--and for that I am grateful. My hope is that as resources are created for people struggling with depression that fewer people will know the pain of losing a loved one to suicide and that for those who have lost a loved one, or may lose a loved one--they may find hope, peace and resources along the excrutiatingly painful journey they will walk.

Scott, I miss your sense of humor. This picture was cropped from one taken of me, Brad & Scott @ dinner one night--and the reason Scott is smiling so big is because he grabbed Brad's thigh in the picture to make him laugh...
Scott, I miss the big fish you'd catch--this one in particular caught him the record for the largest tiger muskie in the state of Utah--and I ended up answering a guy to a dance with it... thanks bro :)
And I miss Lake Powell with you. I have only gone once since you died--and that was to celebrate Sydney's birthday...but it just wasn't the same. Maybe someday my love of that lake will return...but I have realized it was more the good memories and the people I loved that were there with me. All this work is for you Scottie! I LOVE YOU!!!

3 comments:

River said...

You are amazing Ashley. You truly are. I have felt the pain of losing a loved one, and a friend to this. I hope there is something like this near me. I would love to go.

dave, catie, and baby b. said...

go ash! i didn't hear about it until after it was over...i ran into your cute mom and she told me all your hard work in putting it together. she's super proud of you.

i think it's so great, all that you're doing for your brother. you're very strong.

catie

Chelise said...

what a monumental tribute :)