A Few of My Favorite Things...

...of the day...

*spending time with lil' Olivia--she's so cute and smiles and talks and has the best personality ever.
*the sun that came out later in the day
*a good night of sleep
*talking to someone who knows more than I do...
*the new wallpaper on my phone--Livie smiling at me :)
*dinner with Dayla--and almost getting towed... we outran the tow-man! in heels :)
*talking with Hannah--good motivation after a lecture tonight.
*Running. Intervals. Running. The good sore after running.
*2 voicemails being asked out while at institute. Topic: dating. Ironic. Both are spiritually apathetic. Dating is about quality and quantity.
*sending happy pictures to hammy, Brad & any that may've smiled.
*a return pic of Stephy @ the park w/Ethan & Blake!
*Running into my old home-teacher & friend who is a new daddy--Congrats Nic & Jake!
*Getting lots of errands run that have been haunting me...
*coming to a decision about where to live this Spring/Summer
*Excitement for BYU Jerusalem
*random acts of kindness
*feeling more motivated
*pondering hope
*reading 2Nephi and understanding so much more because of my study of Isaiah.
*I love the prophet Isaiah.
*my humidifier.
*a nice hot shower and freshly shaven legs
*Seeing STEPHY this week!!!
*The best card ever in the mail from Christi!
*being reinforced in positive attributes and a desire to be better by good friends.
*fresh blackberries
*my puppy--thanks
*beautiful fresh flowers from a friend :) Thanks!
*drinking lots of water
*A card to Ohio
*being in bed before 11:00p 2 nights in a row.
*feeling God's love for other people as I serve...
*A new day tomorrow...

I Think I've Been Spoiled...

It's not even noon and there are so many things that I want to share with someone...and I think I've been spoiled. Having roommates like Rebecca, Stephanie, Christianne (practically a roommate ;) Courtney, Monica, Nicole, Kim, Suzy, Tara, Cassia, Kim, Jayne, Riley and serving a mission with Emryn, Kaila, Stefanie, Andrea, Jennifer & Emily taught me about companionship. Having someone there to share the joys, sorrows and everyday in general. I miss that.

People laugh when missionaries [those who go out and teach full-time about the gospel of Jesus Christ] when they get home from serving 18-24 months and they are so accustomed to having wonderful companions at their side... fools mock... there's nothing more wonderful.

I remember going to the local market with my mother the day I returned from serving in Washington and she divided the grocery list in half and asked me to get the produce... I just stood there entirely befuddled. I didn't want to go by myself. Here I was a 22 year old woman and I wanted my mother at my side. What if something wonderful happened? What if something not-so-wonderful happened? Who would I share it with?

It is actually a great blessing to realize how important this is to me because I was engaged to someone who didn't really care about what was going on in my life. It makes me think of two scriptures: Corinthians 6:14 "Be ye not unequally yoked together..." and also Doctrine & Covenants 88:40 Where intelligence, wisdom, truth, virtue, light, mercy & justice--cleaveth, embraceth, loveth, claimeth, receiveth and continueth...

Any good friendship and relationship is equally joined--yoked--and we do cleave together. [Cleave: to adhere closely; stick; cling; to remain faithful; to cleave to one's principles in spite of persecution.]

*A wonderful day in the temple.
*The teachings of the temple in Exodus 40 and Isaiah 56
*The opportunity to help people today that were blind, crippled, or spoke another language.
*A loving family who has supported me although I've struggled since Scott died
*Sister M. returning the third week in a row
*The capacity to memorize although that is not my strong point
*Keith encouraging me to come to class last night and knowing I needed to be there
*The teachings of the Atonement of Jesus Christ is Isaiah 53
*knowing that God knows who I am and where I am
*An increased capacity to love as an outgrowth of pain
*Remembering a good friends family who just lost a brother
*The capacity to help RL who's struggling
*Reconnecting with loved ones
*Being surrounded by good men and starting to feel more comfortable around them
*Talking with my "little sister" and being able to help her
*Sunlight
*Fresh Snow & a heated apartment :)

Peace--A Triumph of Principles

"It was Ralph Waldo Emerson who declared the mighty truth, “Nothing can bring you peace but yourself. Nothing can bring you peace but a triumph of principles.” (“Self-Reliance,” in Ralph Waldo Emerson: Essays and Lectures, New York: The Library of America, 1983, p. 282.)

Peace is not a purchase away. Peace is not when the final installment is paid. Peace is not when marriage comes nor when all the children are enrolled in school. Peace is not when the last child returns from the mission field. Peace is not when an inheritance is received. Peace is not when the scars of death start to heal.

True peace must not be dependent upon conditions or happenings. Peace must stem from an inward contentment built upon trust, faith, and goodwill toward God, fellowmen, and self. It must be constantly nurtured by the individual who is soundly anchored to the gospel of Jesus Christ. Only then can a person realize that the trials and tribulations of daily life are less important than God’s total goodness.

Lasting peace is an eternal personal quest. Peace does come from obedience to the law. Peace comes to those who develop character and trust...

Flabbiness of character should always be more of a concern than flabbiness of muscles..." --Marvin J. Ashton

http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=14b48949f2f6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1

Life Update...

Life is good. The days of sunlight are starting to be more frequent than not. Running outside is becoming a more common occurrence for me. Work is going well. I am surrounded by so many good people. Enjoying good friends--weddings, babies homecomings and other wonderful events. Dating good men. Learning. Growing. Sharing the gospel. Loving my new niece. Spending time with my mom. Learning to can and bringing good family traditions back from the dead (BTW Brad you can totally open them--mine are gone :) and they are just as good as they were 18 years ago! Sorry mom, I had to tell him.) Making new friends here and far away (love Emma & the girls!) staying in touch with those I love from Washington. Cooking and keeping the house... Enjoying things I've never taken the time for here at BYU--like choir and the Luau and Passover--"stopping to smell the roses" as my dear friend advised me. Lots of pics from all these things... probably in no particular order--I'm just in a hurry and want to get them posted for those interested. Thanks to everyone for helping me through a rough winter. I love & appreciate you all!

Dating...

So... I had to attend a concert choir performance tonight to make up for missing our retreat--to attend Rebecca's wedding--which was totally worth it by the way! And the wonderful date just continued--great conversation--good dinner--and out for ice cream. Oh yeah, and being hit on at Rumbi and by the man at the ice cream shop... I will protect his identity and not tell you which one. It gave us something to laugh at afterward...

Ice cream man: "So, how are you tonight..."
Ashley: "I'm wonderful, and you?"
Ice cream man: "I'm great."
AShley: "I bet--you make people happy all day giving them ice cream."
Icre Cream man: "I bet you make people happy all day in whatever you do..."
Ashley: "ugh... Yep, I'm a massage therapist.
Ice cream man: "Wow. We should totally swap services, I'll provide the ice cream, you provide the massage..."
Ashley: "No. I'd be fat--you'd be healthy."
Ice cream man: "c'mon... if I bat my eyes like this '""'
Ashley: "no"
Ice cream man: "how about the lower lip one..."
Ashley: "works for my nephew, but no."
Ice cream man: "thanks for coming in, be sure to come back.."
(I felt really awkward, I won't lie...) Christi it was like the beach...
"I gotta be honest man... you're really making me feel awkward!" :)

Date: "do you know that guy?"
Ashley: Nope, never seen him before in my life"
Date: "Whoa, I thought he was in your ward or something..."

*I just got off the phone with one of my good guy friends and we had an interesting conversation that sparked a few of these thougths on dating...

The best things about the date: (and from a few others recently)
7:30-10:30--home in time to get ready for Courtney's wedding tomorrow, and respectful of both our time constraints.
Great conversation! I love to learn about people and what they are passionate about and/or going through in life. It's my major for crying out loud. And I don't think there is anything better than being understood.
Being left wanting to see them again and excited about whenever that is.
Having it well planned, but still room to adjust if needed.
Good uplifting environment...and yes--I even took my journal into the concert...
(I only wrote down a few impressions ;)
The adorable little girl in front of us that kept asking if it was over yet--I gave her a piece of bubble gum (after asking her dad) to tide her through the last 2 songs:) What can I say I'm a good aunt! and I remember being there--my attention span isn't much longer.
Having someone look into my eyes when they talk to me.
A hug at the end of the date...maybe it is just having lived in Florida with the Latino greeting (kiss kiss hug) but it's just a nice end to a date.
Getting dressed up and being told you look nice by your date :)
Just someone saying I'd love to get to know you better/spend time with you, can we grab dinner or go to lunch sometime? It is so less scary.
Knowing that there is no pressure--if the first date is fun, we may go out again.
Learning who I am in the context of dating and who they are as well.
"Regards."
Being with someone who makes me laugh.
Someone who isn't texting the whole time/or ever.
Having someone open your door--even if they are just your friend.
Seeing someone a little nervous on the first date--I believe what was said in institute everyone deserves 2 dates at least--1 they are all awkward, 2 you get a chance to see more of who they are.
Knowing that you have nothing to lose. If you don't become best friends, you'll both marry others who are your best friends.
That a great date can be very inexpensive--hikes and walks are fantastic! and for all you lame DTRer's in Provo for giving walks a bad rap... I plan to reinstate the date... I love simple things like that--or going out to the lake and taking a walk, or going to take pictures--personal favorite.
Strolling through historic PC--Park City ;)
Having it well planned...no matter how simple. Reading childrens books at the book store, making cookies and leaving them at random houses, finger painting, ti's mostly about who you are with rather than what you are doing... and if a girl says yes--she values your friendship and wants to get to know you better.

Frustrations--in general: (and if my date tonight is reading this--I totally understand and am not referring to that..)
If you are going to be late, please call.
Call early enough in the week that if I really do want to go out with you, I don't already have 6 dates and you think I don't care...
Have confidence--it is so attractive when a man knows who he is and what he wants and to know that for even an hour he wants to spend time with you.
DON'T ask out via text or facebook or email.
The interrogation: dates should be filled with light, edifying, enjoyable, not stressful... life has enough stress without adding to it.
Don't talk about marriage. A healthy/realistic person is not even thinking marriage in the begining, they are thinking what mountain to hike tomorrow, or what they learned in conversation, or about the NCAA tournament...
Don't send a thank you card a week later if you're not interested...(no names...RH ;)
That is kind of want spured this whole thing.

I think that when we take the pressure off ourselves we actually see if it is someone we enjoy spending time with and can make an informed decision as to whether or not we would like to go out with them again--

PS feel free to leave advice, feedback, male or female... I have a lot to learn!

Ever Just Have One of Those Days...weeks...mortalities?

Shocking that I would blog about emotions, eh? I just recently had the same adult--who I respect and look up to very much--tell me twice that I think too often about my brother and that I need to move on with my life.I guess it stings mostly because I really am trying my best and it saddens me to think that there are those around me--who "know" and "love" me--that think I am not doing a very good job at life.

It makes me think of Doctrine & Covenants 42:45--where God commands "thou shalt live together in love, insomuch that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die..."

I was torn between wanting to share that verse of scripture, bursting into tears, or saying F-you. I chose silence. And in my head rehearsed the line from the hymn "Lord, I Would Follow Thee: ...In the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eye can't see..."

That song has come to mean a great deal to me:

Savior, may I learn to love thee,
walk the path that thou hast shown,
pause to help and lift another,
finding strength beyond my own.
Savior may I learn to love thee--
Lord I would follow thee.

Who am I to judge another
when I walk imperfectly?
In the quiet heart is hidden
sorrow that the eye can't see.
Who am I to judge another?
Lord, I would follow thee.

I would be my brother's keeper;
I would learn the healers art.
To the wounded and the weary
I would show a gentle heart.
I would be my brother's keeper--
Lord, I would follow thee.

Savior, may I love my brother
As I know thou lovest me,
Find in thee my strength, my beacon,
For thy servant I would be.
Savior, may I love my brother--
Lord, I would follow thee.

Obviously losing my own brother to despair makes that song have special meaning, and I have tried to consecrate my life to God so that never again does one of God's children pass through my life without knowing that I love them every chance I get. I don't care if I look stupid for loving, or serving, or listening. I try to not judge and genuinely care for the welfare of others. I try everyday to allow the Lord to strengthen me and enable me to do good things and lead me to where He would like me to be--and apparently that's not good enough for some. Fortunately I know that I can stand before God and give an accountability for my life today and each day I've lived. I fall short all the time, but that is why I have a Savior--Jesus Christ--who makes "repentance" change, growth & learning possible.

How grateful I am to my loving Heavenly Father who speaks to my heart and my mind and sends me comfort when I need it. For any of you who know me--I love cards and sweet notes and appreciating people anyway I can. A friend of mine had a rough day today and so I went to pick up a few things at the store to make some amazing peanut butter bars--and wandered through the card section *as much to get her a card as to ease my own heart. And one Hallmark said:

"Perhaps they are not the stars,
but rather openings in heaven
where the love of our lost ones
shines down to let us know
they are with us."

This has special meaning... We used to lay on top of our houseboat at Lake Powell, or on Scott's boat at Pineview and count shooting stars. The day after Scott's funeral I came back to Provo--entirely lost--not knowing which way was up--and a friend called (about 2am.) He knew me really well and that there was very little chance that I was sleeping... he asked if I'd like to go for a drive and talk or just sit (no this was not a call for action, he genuinely cared) and we parked in the west parking lot facing the temple--I think I cried more than I talked and he just listened. And as I felt as though my heart may break into a thousand pieces--and never again be whole--a shooting star started high in the middle of the sky and for at least 2 minutes shot across the sky, behind the temple spire--leaving a radiant trail of every color and taking minutes to fade. I knew the Lord placed that star in orb long before I even knew the meaning of a broken heart...

And then a similar star in the middle of nowhere (the midwest) as I moved to Florida--not knowing why--or if I would even survive there. And there was the corn field outside Nauvoo with Christianne... And then there's the line from the Paul Simon song that Sydney (4) wanted to sing at her daddy's funeral:

"If you leap awake
In the mirror of a bad dream
And for a fraction of a second
You can't remember where you are
Just open your window
And follow your memory upstream
To the meadow in the mountain
Where we counted every falling star.."

I don't know why I miss Scott everyday. Maybe I was a little too obedient to the command to love in such a way that I weep at his loss, or that I have only cried over it twice. I know days are harder that I know he would be there--like at Brad's baby blessing--I would have been chasing little loved ones and being harassed by Scott, and instead I just tried to make myself useful and not cry. I know Scott would be happy for Brad, Abby, Mo and me. I could feel him strengthening me as I sang in church--I hadn't wanted to--I hadn't sung since he died--my heart has been too raw--But I did it. Even if it wasn't great--I did it. (appropriately it was written for primary children--I felt about that meek and lowly.) And singing in choir and in the devotional... I appreciated that she spoke about some long lasting trials like losing loved one...and maintaining our faith amid those trials.

I've started painting and pursuing photography again as Scott encouraged. At one point he even gave me money to paint him something. I never had a chance to finish it for him--but I will.

I am back finishing BYU--even though I never wanted to be in the valley of sorrowful memories again.

I talked to Debbie from the Jerusalem program again and she handed me an application and asked if I was ready yet and that she wanted me to go.

I'm running again. I'd been training for the St. George Marathon in 2005--but that was a pretty rough year--Scott checked himself into rehab the same time as the race. He was always the one to remind me that it's just one foot in front of the other... for 26.2mi ;) And I know he's proud that I am again putting one foot in front of the other.

I'm utilizing all I have learned to try and help others and I know that the Lord has placed people in my life that I wouldn't even begin to understand or empathize with had I not known the experiences since 2006.

I know Scott would be proud--but he's not here to hug or tease or fight with or encourage me or cook for or clean up after of ski with or laugh with or beat up my ex/current boyfriends. And no matter how fast or how well I "move forward in my life" nothing will change that. All I can do is attempt to love others more fully, and live life to the best of my capacity and live worthy of eternal life and in that way honor his memory each day.

Y'all may just think that I'm a pansy for struggling after 2 1/2 years...and to you I say... follow another blog. So many triggers... the baby blessing. Going to Boise--I haven't been back since I was camping with Steph and her family. Moving forward in my life.

I guess part of it is that I feel very alone--I've been blessed with incredible friends throughout my life--but we've moved so many times and into other phases and places--and I never want to burden someone I hardly know--but sometimes on days like today it's just nice to have a friend to take a walk with, or a drive and just listen, and talk, and cry and laugh... a friend who won't tell you to move on or that you're not doing a very good job at life. Serving a mission and coming home with high hopes of seeing my family members re-activated and wanting the gospel--and then seeing them use agency contrary to that...has caused me to struggle almost everyday feeling that I am not doing a very good job at life.

Thank Heaven tomorrow is Friday.

I am grateful that all God asks is that I give my very best each day and strengthens me when I do all that I can--and to anyone else that hasn't been there (and even if you have--every person is different and experieces loss differently)... please tread lightly you may not know how rough the road is the person is walking, or what sorrow the eye can't see...

My Love Hate Relationship with the Y

Why? Well, a couple of reasons... I have been running more and enjoying the sunshine rather than the gym. Today I was going for a short 2-3mi run when I ran into a really good old friend--Love you Camille! It gave me a second wind, so I headed north and ran a few sets of stairs, then ran back home still wasn't tired and decided that since the Jerusalem packet instructs us that we should be in good enough physical shape to run (I think it may actually have said walk...) to the Y and back 2-3 times a day so that we are ready for our excursions... I decided that sounds like a great goal to add into marathon training... but I also learned that there is a reason that God gives us little by little, line upon line... my 2-4 miles runs had not prepared me to run to the Y from my house, after a normal 'shlog.' It's like Sam relating it to spiritual conversion and consistency--just because I used to run miles on the beach or run to the Y long before that--today was a great reminder that I am no longer at sea level...or 21 years old. I also learned that(ok, maybe it was more like reinforced...) but I can be kind of strong willed/stubborn at times. I don't like switch backs... so I ran up 7th East until it ran into the mountain and then I ran straight up the mountain... I loved the run, even saw a few good friends... but I think body may hate me in the morning... especially when I am back on the mountain!

But don't get me wrong... It was absolutely beautiful... and I was able to clear my mind very well (I think all cerebral capacities and physical energies were directed toward enabling my lungs to function :)And it even helped to even out the missionary-tan-looking mess I had from studying outside yesterday!

I remember now why I love running... and we'll see how I feel about it when my alarm rings at 5:30a... I say as I climb into bed!

A Bright New Day!!!

I was just notified that this photo "Enduring Hope" is being published by photo laureates, in the Best of year anthology. That's exciting. I've always wanted to pursue photography and haven't ever had the courage in myself or my work to do so...I'd like to thank my family and Christianne for not only hanging my artwork--but for giving it as gifts :) It is pretty encouraging when you see it in 15 different houses.

And I have decided to go with number 9, shot @ Lake Powell the only trip I've gone since my brother died--It was take at 6am on Syndey (His 5yr old little girls) birthday.Possible titles... Still open to suggestions...
"Sydney's Sunrise"
"Out of Darkness"
"Into the Light"
"The Sun Will Rise"
"The Hope of a New Day"
...Any thoughts?

*Some other wonderful things of the day:
*Singing Joseph Smith's First Prayer in the BYU Devotional and contemplating the importance of the restored gospel [good news] of Jesus Christ in my life.
*A great devotional address that helped me with things on my mind
*Beautiful green eyes so I can wear whatever I want on St. Patty's day!
*An incredibly beautiful day!
*Olivia Jayne's baby blessing (Sunday)*Abby's parents farewell
*An awesome relationship with my brothers--I have missed them!
*Being able to talk to Stephanie--for hours and hours and hours!!! Literally :)
*And for my favs that make that possible!
*Brian's friendship & talking with him about the gospel
*A feeling that I am where the Lord wants me.
*Chocolate shakes from Costco--partially frozen Mmmm!
*Waking up feeling less anxious for the first time in years today.
*One of the sweet young women in Florida reconnecting!
*Stopping by the BYU Jerusalem office--having the director not only remember me, hand me an application, ask me to come and say there's no way she could forget a countenance as bright as mine.
*Feeling such gratitude that my life didn't turn out the way I'd hoped this year.
*Learning who I am in the context of dating good men
*a very high compliment from a man & friend I look up to very much
*A long distance run yesterday
*Running into and helping a friend yesterday who is struggling
*Feeling hope
*Stephy singing on my voicemail--and laughing out loud in choir (yesterday)
*Stephy watching up on BYU-TV
*Nikki's texts :)
*The good friends I have made in choir
*Not falling back into the arms of my ex yesterday...
*Feeling the peace and joy from accomplishment
*Looking & feeling beautiful today
*The crocuses that were breaking through the ground
*My cactus that is loving it's new transplant to a larger pot
*Seeing Ashley today
*Not getting a parking ticket for parking in the Marriot Center--I have a permit they were going to mail it--I just haven't gotten it...(I put a note to the parking man on my windshield :) God loves me!
*Finding the books on Amazon that I've wanted... for $1.49
*A desire to develop my talents and a feeling of my self-worth
*The speaker addressing and validating long-lasting trials
*A good night of restful sleep
*Delicious leftovers from Sunday--our family can cook!
*That feeling and love of life coming back that I had lost for a time.
*The capacity to help others because of that pain I've experienced
*losing fake friends on facebook & maintaining sincere relationships
*THE LORD'S HAND IN MY LIFE... even if at times it is guiding me down a path I hadn't thought with initial promptings... I love the Lord!!!
*Emma's love of the Book of Mormon.
*Knowing that Brad (and Scott) are happy for me to be singing and creating artwork!

The feeling that as I accomplish things that are hard for me--and way outside my comfort zone I grow more confident in the Lord's capacity to enable me t great things far beyond my natural strength and that I believe in myself and attain divine confidence as I learn of and trust in Him--like publishing my artwork, or singing (between a solo with the choir in church, and in the BYU devotional... I may even work up to and have the confidence for Women's chorus :)

*My only slight annoyance was that I couldn't take notes in the devotional because we were singing... it was really hard for me. But I knew I could look it up, or hope that someone would take them for me!

Sorry I feel like this is a little scatter-brained, or like those nights in the mission I only had 3 minutes in order to obey the schedule--and bullet points had to suffice!

How much have you changed in 15 years?

****15 YEARS AGO (1994)****
1) Age? 10-11
2) Dating? What was that? oh... maybe the Oak Lane boys...?
3) Work? Crist,Cathcart & Peterson; a few paper routes
4) Residence? Bountiful Utah
5) Hang out? Bigelows, Grandma Spikers, School, anywhere but home.
6) Contacts/glasses? yes, but only to be cool like Diane Cutler :)
7) Best friends? Enu, Scott, Brad, Grandma Spiker, Emily, Riley, Spencer.
8) Tattoos? 0--Will never have a tattoo.
9) Piercings? 1-Ears
10) Car? in my dreams...
11) Religious? no
12) Heart broken? yes.
13) Single/taken/Married/Divorced? single
14) Kids? I was one
15) School? Oak Hills Eagles! Go fight Win! Perfect attendance, NHS, 4.0, perfect PSAT, Student council, won the read-a-thon, & Jump for life...big fan of school.
16) Drugs/alcohol? What's that?
17) Family? 3 older brothers. parents separated. I really missed my brother when he was in Japan.
18) Hobbies? reading. trying to be cool like my brothers. Water skiing, snow-skiing, painting, singing, basketball, soccer, writing...
19) Service? student council
20) Of note: innocent ignorance is bliss.

***10 YEARS AGO (1999)***
1) Age? 15-16
2) Dating? Brandon
3) Work? Christopher's, Cafe Alicia, CC&P, Christmas Cottage, Dee's Trees warehouse
4) Residence? Bountiful--Bigelows/anywhere that would take me...
5) Hang out? Snowbird, Alta, Lake Powell, Friends
6) Contacts/glasses? no
7) Best friends? Brandon & Family, Jeff & Family, Matt, Devin, Cole & Family, John, Riley, Tony, Scott, Brad, Matt, Emily & Family,
9) Piercings? 2 In My Ears
10) Car? Dodge Shadow--Teal--the color of gangrene baby!
11) religious? Starting to be. Diane Lake challenged me to read the Book of Mormon, live by it's teachings and said I would be happy...
12) Heart broken? Over & over again baby.
13) Single/Dating/Taken/Married/Divorced? taken.
14) Kids? no thanks.
15) School? not that I remember. But I did get voted least likely to graduate...
16) Drugs/ Alcohol? I wished at times...
17) Family? Loved/ looked to my brothers. Parents divorced.
18) Hobbies? Skiing. Writing. Surviving.
19) Service? Please...
20) Of Note: still alive

***5 YEARS AGO (2004)***
1) Age? 21-22
2) Dating? no--I was a missionary for the LDS church
3) Work? Missionary work baby!!! Spokane Washington, Republic Washington, British Columbia, Cheney Washington
4) Residence? All over the place
5) Hang out? I was there to work & teach, there was no hanging out.
6) Contacts and/or glasses? no
7) Best friends? Roadhouse, Staiger, Coleman, Crist (Kaila), Talley, Sayer, Ludlow's, Grimsrud's, Jorgensen's, Roger's, Beans/Klotz, Bond's, Brad, Scott, Sydney, Stockton.
9)How many piercings did you have? 1 In My Ears (c'mon the prophet said so...)
10) Car? Corolla, Dodge or bike :)
11) Religious? Yes. Exactly obedient with an immature understanding of the gospel, but a desire to do what the Lord's will.
12) Heart broken? My heart was no longer open to being broken it was locked...
13) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced? Unavailable.
14) Kids? no
15) School? Deferment from BYU to serve. Studied VA in Europe... unsure...
16) Drug/alcohol? Not a chance.
17) Family? Letter writing was great! Cutest niece & nephew new to the family! Dad remarried, 4 or 5 step-siblings.
18) Hobbies? In mission field: planning, listening, teaching, tracting, singing, letters, eating, service. (not in mission field: Cooking, skiing, snow-mobiling, water-skiing, wakeboarding, hiking, biking, camping, photography, singing, back-packing, basketball, soccer, painting, writing,
19) Service? Sharing the gospel, temple work, family history, community service.
20) of note: my organs got paralized in my last area as a missionary.

****2006*****************************************************************
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---------------------------------------------------------------breathing.
20) of note: BYU student, MTC teacher, Relief Society Pres, got hit by a temple worker while jogging, got stalked by a BYU student who received revelation to marry me, and my brother died--that was a rough month. but I'm still breathing.

****TODAY (2009)****
1) Age? 26
2) Work? Self-employed L.M.T.
3) Residence? Back in Provo...
5) Best friends? Jesus Christ. Christi, Steph, Kim, Brad, Mom, Staiger, cactus.
6) Do you talk to your old friends? Yes.
7) Piercings? ears
9) Car? 2007 Toyota Corolla, manual, Florida :) plates
10) Heart broken? It's in repair... but stronger than ever before
11) Religious? My immature & untried faith was not sufficient for the trials of 2006, and after much work & cultivation I can again say that I know of a surety that Jesus Christ is my Savior & has infinite power to enable me to endure anything.
12) Kids? none, but I've been a nanny & love my nieces & nephew
13) Single/Dating/Taken/Married/Divorce? Dating 2-3x's/day on occasion.
14) Contacts/Glasses? glasses but only for a stigmatism--I have 20x7 vision... that's right... I could be a fighter pilot.
15) School? A degree in massage therapy, back to finish up BYU, planning to attend BYU-Jerusalem.
16) Drugs/alcohol? There were times I wanted to as an escape the pain of the past few years, but through the example of a good friend fighting to maintain sobriety, and having lost my brother to drugs & alcohol & by the mercy & deliverance of Jesus Christ I choose not to.
17) Family? Good healthy relationships with my mom, 2 brothers + wives & niece. I miss my brother who died & his kids every day. Have severed all abusive ties. Am planning/preparing/studying for the ideal LDS marriage & family--And with God's help--I will attain it.
18) Hobbies? Breathing, cooking, skiing, thinking, teaching, journaling, water-skiing, wakeboarding, hiking, biking, camping, photography, singing, talking, back-packing, basketball, soccer, painting, writing, crying, reading, sleeping, blogging, traveling, sky-diving, surfing, kite-surfing, laying on the beach, cleaning.
19) Service? Sharing the gospel, AFSP, big sisters, RS, temple, family history, simple acts of kindness, saying thank you, reaching out.
20) Of note: I know God, who I am & what's most important in life. Trial & loss provide a forum conducive to learning those things if we so choose.

The Blessings of the Temple...

"The Publicity Dilemma - LDS Newsroom
Source: newsroom.lds.org
SALT LAKE CITY 9 March 2009 Like other large faith groups, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints sometimes finds itself on the receiving end of attention from Hollywood or Broadway, television series or books, and the news media. ..."

For all those inviting to random groups & boycotts I've chosen to do as exemplified by the church & focus on my own life & aims and "determine [my] own course as [I] continue to preach the restored gospel of Jesus Christ throughout the world."

It's not in avoidance of conflict; rather, I just know the good that the teachings of the gospel of Jesus Christ have brought into my life & I'd rather share those things than waste my time in debate of a television series that in bad taste has chosen to disparage Latter-day Saints.

Additionally, one of the greatest blessings of the gospel of Jesus Christ is agency-the right to act & think for ourselves. While good decisions produce peace & clarity, no one is forced to choose one way or another. I just know for me the best thing I can do is live my life according to rigtheous principles and allow others to decide for themselves. A good guide I've found on whether or not something is good is if it brings me closer to God & helps others.

The link above has a clip on "Why Mormons Build Temples" which I found very enlightening.

Reflections

Thanks so much!!! You've helped me to narrow the first round before submission (March 31st) on the subject of reflections...now please comment and leave your top choice, and why it is your top choice.

*And yes, the numbering is intentionally non-sequitur so they match the results of the first round as well.
#1
#2
#3
#4
#6
#7
#8
#9
#10
#13
#15
#18
#22
#23
#24
#25
#26
#27
#28