Never Cease to Dream...

"Have Faith, Not Fear
I have just two things to say to you who are troubled about the future. I say them lovingly and from my heart.

First, we must never let fear and the father of fear (Satan himself) divert us from our faith and faithful living. Every person in every era has had to walk by faith into what has always been some uncertainty. This is the plan. Just be faithful. God is in charge. He knows your name and He knows your need.

Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ—that is the first principle of the gospel. We must go forward. God expects you to have enough faith, determination, and trust in Him to keep moving, keep living, keep rejoicing. He expects you not simply to face the future; He expects you to embrace and shape the future—to love it, rejoice in it, and delight in your opportunities.

God is eagerly waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams, just as He always has. But He can’t if you don’t pray, and He can’t if you don’t dream. In short, He can’t if you don’t believe....So, in a world of tribulation, let’s remember our faith. Let’s recall the other promises and prophecies that have been given, all the reassuring ones, and let’s live life more fully, with more boldness and courage than at any other time."

--Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=86bde5e18be63110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&hideNav=1

I love to see the temple!!!

I just want to say that I love the temple! I have the opportunity right now to work there and have come to an even greater appreciation of God, my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ. I also learn each time I am there--and it inspires me to keep on learning! Working there for 6 hours each week has been a great blessing--a sacrifice of time and a reward of many sweet blessings and insights and most of all the peace that exists there and continues in my heart and home as I serve there! The temple has been closed for cleaning and the 4th of July...and I am SO happy to have it open again this week! It is a great privlige to have, as in ancient times a house of the Lord :) Since I lived in Florida and the temple was 4 hours away--I am now so thankful that I have so many temples here :)

To learn more...
On the purpose of temples:
http://www.lds.org/temples/purpose/0,11298,1897-1,00.html

Or to see the temples of the world:
http://www.lds.org/temples/geographical/0,11380,1899-1,00.html

AFSP 5K SLC

As many of you know, I am an active supporter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and have been since I lost my brother to suicide 2 years ago this month. I have done 5K's in Boca Raton and Miami, the 20 mile overnight in New York City, and now am helping to establish resources for the community here in Utah.

We are hoping to gain the support of people all across the Wasatch front and after a successful 5k in September establish a chapter here in the state of Utah that will raise awareness and increase preventative efforts by educating Jr. high and high school aged kids, educating physicians to recognize and deal with those who are suffering from mental illness and are at risk to take their own life, and to have a survivor outreach program for those that have lost loved ones to suicide.

My goal this year is much less that last year simply because I don't have the time to invest in fundraising and am spending much more time on administrative things as event chair.

PLEASE REGISTER AND PARTICIPATE WITH US!!!
http://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.createProfile&source=R

Even if you are in college and donating will not be your strong point, there is no minimum donation--we would love for you to be there!!!

Or, if you'd rather, you can donate to me or any of my team members:
http://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.participant&eventID=606&participantID=4120

I wouldn't be a part of this if it weren't a good cause. The majority of our board are not members of the LDS faith, and they moved it from general conference weekend to September 27th to accommodate those of my faith in this valley--and I would love for them to see how wonderful the support can be :) People that I go to school with will be there giving massages and we will have many door prizes and a great atmosphere.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL YOU DO AND CONTINUE TO DO FOR GOOD!

For more information:
http://www.outofthedarkness.org/

"The Trial of Our Faith Precedes Salvation..."

Have you ever wondered why life is hard? Have you had the occasion to wonder if you could handle the severity of the trial at hand? Have you ever thought that you just couldn't endure one more hardship? Does it ever seem that the night is just too dark, or felt buried by financial or social pressures? How about life not going the way you had hoped or planned?

I have.

And, well, for a long time I've thought that meant that I was weak... but I am coming to realize that it really just means I am human. Everyone experiences pain and heartache, disappointment and loss, joy and happiness. I looked around my classroom at UCMT today, and I realized that there is not 1 person in there that isn't going through something hard--death of a loved one, morning sickness, financial setbacks, broken hearts and relationships, issues with their children, friends, spouses, insomnia, illness, drug addiction...and we already lost 1 to suicide. I realize this is a very small sample from the human race... but nonetheless...everyone is up against some major opposition.

This week I have just felt tired and sad and overwhelmed.
Relationships
Last week I followed the feelings in my heart and mind to end the relationship I was in...with someone I care a great deal about. In order for me to maintain healthy boundaries, I remain quite detached from my family of origin. I did survive the 2 year anniversary of my brother's suicide this month and feel very grateful to God for making that possible. And other than that... I am so busy I don't really have time for deep and meaningful relationships right now.
Finances
I would be lying if I said that finances was a strong point for me... it is an area in which I have plenty of room to improve. Being aware of that I budgeted out the year--since I am in a full-time (60hr/week) program including anatomy, physiology, pathology--and sciences are not my strong point...well... seeing as this is my first year on a real budget...appropriately it is my first year being in a car accident...didn't budget for that one. I made it through the past few months by the mercy of God and a whole handful of miracles *next blog* but with only 11 weeks left in my program... I feel like I am drowning.
Service
I love to serve...sometimes to a fault. I am always very willing to serve and I rarely say no (although I am improving in that area of my life as well.) I currently serve as the chair for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention for the State of Utah--with a 5k coming up in September--PLEASE JOIN US :) I serve in the Provo Utah Temple for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and was recently released from my second term as president of my branch of the largest women's organization in the world--the Relief Society...
Education
With only 11 weeks of my program left...I am tired. We have 8 finals this week and projects and protocols due in every class. There are so many administrative problems at our campus that it can be very frustrating when you have paid to attain an education and some of them prevent learning and development.
Spirituality
Now this is probably the only dimension enabling me to hold on amid all the trials and testings and exhaustion... and don't get me wrong...when I say spirituality I mean very specifically my relationship with God, who I know to be my Father in Heaven, and his Son Jesus Christ. I don't mean LDS culture, or Utah County expectations, or singles ward (my college age congregation) activities, I mean where I stand before God. It is communicating with God through prayer, receiving guidance from him as I study the scriptures, it is feeling peace in my heart and a transcending love that I know only he can impart--it is a reason to get up and go everyday--and it helps me cultivate and maintain a desire and capacity to live--and do so with joy.

With the many dimensions and stresses in my life--both eustress and distress--there are times when I would like to give up. Times when I have a tendency to ask why life is so hard, if I can handle the severity of the trials at hand, if I endure one more hardship, if the night really is too dark, of to feel I'm buried beneath financial, social, educational stress, and to become frustrated that life just isn't going as I'd hoped or planned... this week it was hard to see beyond the trials. I just kept telling myself--I can do anything for 11 weeks--but there were times I doubted even that...

So I pulled out my scriptures...almost as a last resort I was so overwhelmed--nearing desperation and possibly even teetering toward apathy...

1 Peter Chapter one: The trial of our faith precedes salvation--Christ foreordained to be the redeemer.
As I read the words of an apostle of Jesus Christ, starting in verse 7: "that the trial of your faith, being more precious than of Gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ. Whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him not, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory..." and then in verse 13: Wherefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and hope to the end for grace that is to be brought unto you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. As obedient children..."

I don't know why my friend has cancer, I don't know why my dream of getting married and raising a family is being postponed, I don't understand why paralyzing illness or abuse has touched my life, I don't know how long I will grieve the loss of my brother, I don't know what it is that I am supposed to be learning right now--in fact there is so much that I don't have answers to...but I know that God lives. I know that he loves me, and with his ability to see the past from the future, the end from the beginning...if he sees a refining purpose in this trial, if my faith in His ability and power unto deliverance will increase...then I will endure.

I'm not really sure why I am throwing this out to the universe, maybe that some other person who maybe struggling can find hope in Peter's words, and purpose in affliction...Maybe to cause me to look at the other side, and better articulate all the blessings that God has placed in my life, or all the growth and strength that results--or even just in admission that regardless of standards or status, I am human and I do struggle and to cut myself some slack...even just in acknowledgement that I don't understand all these things, and I lack a great deal of strength and wisdom, but I trust in God.

I PROMISE TO POST...

Just think...at the very latest...I graduate in 12 weeks... I can post then...?

Beautiful Utah Outdoors!

Fun Photos w/ the Kids!